Spring 2011

Spring is finally here.  This has felt like the longest winter of my life.  My heart has been just as cold as the weather.  I had another moment in the breakroom at work today where someone asked me how I was doing and I just couldn't help but to cry again.  Losing Jordan has been like living in a nightmare.  Her pictures surround us and the girls are really beginning to miss her so much.  They just don't understand.  We lost Dingo a couple of months ago and Tater died last week.  Michael went out to feed him and he was lying beside his dog house.  He looked like he was sleeping peacefully.  They are both buried in the back yard.  Vegas and Mac are buried in the front yard, and my first family is now gone.  We found out that Papa Don has lung cancer back in January.  Three months of tests and the conclusion seems to be that there are no options for surgery and chemo would be a long shot.  After watching Jordan and Papa Louie go through their treatments, he has determined that it isn't for him.  He goes back to the doctor tomorrow and they'll determine if there are other medications that can help.  With everything I learned from Jordan, all I could think was that we need to make each and every day with him special.  I barely get a chance to talk to him as I rush in and out of the house every day.  He and Mema Shirley come to take care of the kids and by the time I get home, they are so beat they can't get home quickly enough.  When I told Peyton what was going on with Papa, he said, "somebody needs to take that man to Texas."  Peyt is a wonderful guy.  As soon as he said Texas, it occured to me that Papa has always wanted to see the Alamo.  So in two weeks, Peyton, Mema and I are heading to San Antonio.  We are leaving the kids with our parents (dividing them amongst the two of them) and heading out west.  We'll stop the first night in Biloxi so Papa can enjoy a night on the town.  Mema will stay in the room...or so she says.  She might find that it isn't so bad to play a few games of blackjack once you know how.  I am so excited about the idea of being on the road with the three of them.  I am ready to put this past winter behind us.  It's time to move on and to enjoy every day we have....none of us are promised tomorrow.